Category Archives: Self-Healing

Choose your reaction

Recently, I pulled up to a set of traffic lights and in the lane beside me, and just ahead of me, stretched an old burgundy Cadillac. The woman driver held an unlit cigarette in her hand.

Seconds later, she put her car in park, exited her vehicle, and ran to her trunk to retrieve her purse and I would assume; her lighter.

The light remained red.

She jumped back into her driver’s seat, and lit her cigarette while she fumbled for her seat belt.

The light remained red, and yet the car behind her honked.

Kind of rude, I thought.

Cadillac lady reacted by flipping the driver of the trailing car the bird.

Interesting, I thought.

The light remained red.

The Honking man, put his car in park, and exited his vehicle.

I couldn’t see his expression.

I put my car in park, just in case I needed to help.

The man approached her car and gently closed the trunk that had failed to latch.

Cadillac lady skidded away in an aggressive manner.

Honking man smiled as he got back into his car.

We choose our reactions. Choose them mindfully.

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It’s your movie

The source of your suffering is not outside of you.  It is within the story of who and what, you believe yourself to be.

Take a step back and become the observer of your experience. Listen very carefully to the story that you are telling.  What words are you using when you describe the reasons why you don’t or can’t?  Who or what is to blame?  Are circumstances and situations happening to you?  Are you pointing your finger at a parent, your spouse, your boss, or your genetic predisposition?   Why are you a victim?

What if you accepted that you were the creator of your problems?  Would it change the manner in which you react to them?

I think it would.

I believe that each one of us is making our own movie about our own unique experience.  It is our purpose.  We play the leading role in the movie.  We write the screenplay, and we direct every scene.  The Universe co-produces with us.

Unconscious Movie Makers are oblivious to this theory.  They believe that life is happening to them, not for them.  They do not appreciate that in every moment they are creating another scene for their movie.

This problem is easily rectified by becoming a Conscious Movie Maker.

Begin by understanding that your movie can be about whatever you choose.  You can be the victim, the villain or the hero in it.  Don’t worry about the critics.  Your only concern should be making your own movie to be as awesome as it can be.

Edit the scenes that you have so far.  Keep in mind that you are the only person who is going to see your movie from beginning to end.  Don’t keep the scenes with bad lighting or horrible acting.  Keep all of the scenes where you are the Superhero.  Keep the ones where you learned important life lessons too.

Update your screenplay, frequently.  Decide as soon as possible what the theme of your movie is going to be.  If you are not sure, just follow your heart.  It will lead you.

Make sure that your character is everything that you want it to be. The only limitation is your own imagination.  Write in that you are healthy, sexy, and rich!  Give the money away if you like, but at least write it in.

Write in your dreams, your desires, and your successes.  Write in great love stories, a supportive family, and loyal friends.  Write in a few scenes with bad guys, for dramatic effect if you like, but don’t waste too much of your valuable film on them.

Write in that your movie does make a difference.

Send your screenplay to Universe, your co-producer.  Be very specific when making a request, because there is a language barrier.  Establish a great working relationship built on trust.  Express your gratitude when you get exactly what you asked for.

Be a great Actor.  Practice for your big scenes by staying in character all of the time.  If you fall out of character, it’s okay, it happens to everyone.  Get back on your mark as soon as possible.

Direct each scene with passion and purpose.  If you don’t like the way that the scene is going; stop shooting and fix it.  Hire new actors; get a different backdrop or set.  Request a meeting with the co-producer and make all of the necessary adjustments so that the scene is exactly as you want it.  Don’t let anyone mess with your artistic license.  It’s your movie, after all.

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Healing with Reiki

I pay attention to my words.  I try not to use the adverbs of always and never. “I always do that…I never do that.”  Either word seems like a commitment to an extreme.  My experience has taught me to never, say never.

Unconditional is another word that I use with discretion.  I appreciate the definition that conditions never apply; always.

So for me, the term Unconditional Love, is ambitious; to say the least.

Reiki is defined as Universal Life Force Energy.  It is the energy of Unconditional Love.  It can never harm.  It can never be depleted.  It follows the universal principle of as you give, so shall you receive.

The physical sensations of Reiki differ from person to person.  Some may feel temperature changes, while some feel vibrations.  Others feel no physical sensations at all.  Some people become emotional when a blockage is removed.  Some people feel like a weight has been lifted from them.

A chronic blockage may take longer to heal than an acute one.

You should rest and drink plenty of water after receiving Reiki.

The magic of Reiki is that it flows to where it is needed.  I am only the channel through which it flows.  It’s an incredible sensation.  It rivals the surge of love that one feels when they think about their baby’s face, and their lover’s embrace, mixed with the emotions of gratitude, compassion, and forgiveness.

The experience humbles me every time.

I have suggested that Reiki occurs while you read my novel.  I call it passive therapy.  When we feel compassion for someone else, or for ourselves, we are experiencing Reiki.

Healing begins with our thoughts.

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The first step toward Self-Healing

One of the mutable laws of the Universe is the Law of Polarity.  It says that everything has an identical opposite or pole.  Good and bad; hot and cold; north and south.  There are two sides to everything and even when things seem to be complete opposites, they are really just varying degrees of the same thing.  Is the water hot or is it less cold?  Is the glass half empty or half full?

I believe that our Human-ness and our Being-ness, observe this law too.  Both are as necessary as the other.  It is the degree to which that defines our experience.

Our Human-ness engages our Ego.  There is a common misconception that our Ego is bad. But Ego is neither good, nor bad.  It speaks literally from our Human experience.  It tells us not to touch the stove again, even if we can’t remember burning our finger as a child.  This voice is necessary for our survival.  It tries to protect us from getting burned again.  In many ways; Human it is the voice of our wounds.

The opposing pole to our Human-ness, is our Being-ness. This voice uses words of love and compassion.  It says that we have always been where we needed to be.  It encourages that we never fail, we learn.  It is the kiss for our boo boo.  It is the voice of our healing.

The first step in our Self-Healing is learning to recognize both voices.

Listen carefully to the language that you use when you re-tell your experiences.  What was happening when you burned your finger?  Are you a victim of the stove’s malice?  Is someone else’s negligence responsible for your burn?  Do you always get burned?  Is that why you are still afraid of stoves?  How many times did you get burned?

Is it the voice of Human, or the voice of Being that you hear the most?

If Human is loudly recounting a painful story; acknowledge it.  Dissect it.  Understand the how, when and why you tell the story as you do.  Accept that it has become your emotional familiarity through repetition.  Appreciate that the painful emotions are not haunting you; you are haunting them.

Then change the story that serves no purpose but to make you feel badly about your experience. Revise it.  Let Being tell the story instead.  Be grateful that you didn’t need to get burned by an iron, a match, and steam before you figured out that it was about temperature, not just the stove.  Reinforce the version where you are the HERO who learned to use the stove without getting burned again.

Celebrate your healing one decibel at a time.

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Yes, you can feel better.

There was a time in my life when I was consumed by a belief that I had an unstable heart condition.  Frequently, my heart would quiver or gallop while my throat felt like it was clamping down on a lodged golf ball.  My pulse would become irregular, and my blood pressure would spike.

It made perfect sense that at 46, my horrendous family history of heart disease was threatening.  I began to tip-toe through my life with fingers crossed.  My goal was to survive long enough to complete the extensive cardiac testing with a diagnosis, prognosis, and magic prescription in hand.

When all of the tests came back negative, I had to consider that my symptoms were psychological.  As a nurse who has worked in mental health for nearly 30 years; it was a hard pill for me to swallow.  I was so sure that it was my heart.

Life was trying to get my attention.  I had ignored the whisper until I could no longer shut off the noise of my misfiring internal alarm.  My physical and emotional body was constricting from fear. Something needed to change but I didn’t know the what, let alone the how.  I only knew that I wanted silence.

My self-healing began when I recognized that I wasn’t in denial; I was in familiarity. Familiarity for me consisted of verbal and physical violence.  What I had experienced in my childhood had shown up in my relationships and in my career choice.  It was what I knew.  It was where I felt at home.  My own thoughts attracted it to me.  I wasn’t a victim, I was an active participant.

Many of us assume that outside sources are responsible for our problems. We live in resistance without even realizing it.  Our EGO tells us that we are as happy as we can possibly be; and more often than not, we believe it.  We detach emotionally with the aid of our favourite pain distractions; or we put our heads down and suffer through our experience.  We don’t appreciate that we could feel better.

Dis-ease is the result of our imbalance.  My story is about learning how to self-heal.  I believe that everyone can easily apply the same techniques to their own bodies.  We can go to our doctors, and we can take the expensive medications that chemically mask our problem, or we can heal the original wound ourselves.  I believe that it really is that simple.

It is my hope that I Remember: A Story of Self-Healing serves as a whisper to those who have not yet realized that they could feel better.  Learning to recognize the whisper is the key to our wellness.

For more information, check out my interview at

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